The Loneliness of Being Solo (And Why Working in The Curious Lounge Actually Matters)

Being self-employed is brilliant until it's lonely.

You're making all the decisions. You're fixing all the problems. You're celebrating wins alone and spiralling about failures alone. You're staring at your calendar wondering why it's not full. You're handling customer complaints by yourself. You're trying to figure out your website on a Tuesday night while everyone else seems to have it sorted.

There's nobody to ask if you're doing it right. Nobody to celebrate with when something works. Nobody to tell you to stop panicking when you have a quiet week.

It's brilliant and it's lonely. Both at once.

The Thing About Self-Employment Nobody Talks About

When you decide to be self-employed, everyone talks about the freedom. Set your own hours. Be your own boss. Do work you love.

What they don't talk about is the isolation.

You're not sitting in an office with people. You're not having water cooler conversations. You're not hearing "oh yeah, I had that problem too, here's what I did."

You're just... alone.

And that changes how you think about your business.

When you're alone, every small problem feels huge. A quiet week feels like failure. A difficult customer interaction feels personal. A technical issue with your website feels impossible.

When you're around other people doing the same thing? Those things feel manageable. Normal, even.

The Isolation Is Real

Last week, one of our students said something that really stuck: "I didn't realise how much I missed just being around other people who GET it."

She's running a coaching business. She's good at her job. But she was sitting alone in her spare room every day, and it was wearing her down.

It's not about needing a distraction. It's about needing someone who understands what it's like.

Your mate with a regular job can't really get why you're panicking about a quiet month. Your family means well but they don't understand why you're "working" when you're sitting in your house. Your customers don't need to know you're struggling with the technical bits.

There's nobody who fully gets it except other self-employed people.

And that isolation, over time, makes you doubt things. Your ability. Your business. Whether this was a good idea.

How It Affects Your Decision Making

When you're isolated, your thinking can get... skewed.

You make decisions based on fear rather than strategy. You chase every lead rather than focus on the right ones. You undercharge because you're worried nobody will hire you anyway. You second-guess everything.

You also stop doing things because it feels pointless. "Why bother building that email list? Nobody's going to sign up anyway." "Why bother with my website? People probably won't find me."

The isolation feeds doubt, and doubt feeds inaction, and inaction kills your business.

Whereas when you're around other people doing the same thing, you see differently.

You see someone else at the same stage as you getting their first customer and you think "oh, so it's possible." You hear someone say "that's exactly what I was worried about" and you feel less alone. You see someone charge a proper price and you think "maybe I should too."

Other people keep you from spiralling into inaccurate thinking.

What The Curious Lounge Actually Is

The Curious Lounge isn't fancy. It's not a networking event with name badges and awkward small talk. It's not a corporate space trying to look impressive. It's just a welcoming and plant filled space where self-employed people can sit together and work.

Here's what actually happens there:

Someone's struggling with their email marketing. Someone else says "oh, I do that, here's what helped me." Not from an expert telling them the "right" way. From someone who's trying the same thing.

Someone launches their website and they're nervous about it. Other people look at it and say "this is actually really good" because they mean it and they get what you were trying to do.

Someone gets their first customer and the whole room celebrates. Because everyone remembers what that felt like and everyone knows it matters.

Someone's having a rough week and just by being there, around humans doing their own thing, they feel better.

Someone learns something useful and shares it. "Oh, I found this tool that makes scheduling easier" or "I figured out how to set up Google My Business" and suddenly everyone's trying it.

It's not business advice. It's not coaching. It's just... people together, supporting each other by existing together.

Why This Matters More Than You'd Think

The isolation of self-employment is a real factor in whether people succeed or give up.

Studies on entrepreneurship show it over and over: the people who don't give up are usually the ones who have community.

Not a expensive mastermind. Not a fancy network. Just people who understand what you're doing and who remind you it's possible.

The Curious Lounge is that.

The Real Friendships

Some of the best friendships have come from The Curious Lounge.

People who started as course-mates and now grab coffee together. People who text each other with questions. People who celebrate each other's wins like they're their own. People who showed up for each other when things were hard.

That doesn't come from a formal "networking event." It comes from doing real work together, being vulnerable together, struggling together.

When you're solving hard problems alongside someone, real connection happens.

What It Feels Like After a Lounge Day

People describe it like:

"I went in worried about everything. I sat with other people for a few hours. I left feeling like I could do this."

"I was so stuck. I talked to someone else and suddenly I had an idea. I went home and implemented it."

"I haven't been to the Lounge in a while and I forgot how much it helps. I came back and remembered I'm not the only one struggling."

"My business is growing and I'm busy, but I came back because I miss the people and I miss feeling part of something."

"I almost quit. I came to the Lounge. Everyone reminded me it's worth sticking with. I left thinking about it differently."

It's not magic. It's just the impact of not being alone.

Why It Exists

It exists because Louize and Matt know that isolation kills businesses. That people give up not because they're not talented but because they're lonely and doubting themselves.

It exists because the best support isn't always the formal kind. Sometimes it's just: being around other humans who get it.

It exists because working alone is hard and you don't have to.